A great guitar for stopping burglars!
SRV666 on 2015/04/01
So back in April.
I was chilling, watching a YouTube video and some guy calls to my house by ringing the doorbell.
So being the lazy mofo I am, I ignore the repeat ringing.
A few moments pass and I hear a huge crash from a window being smashed downstairs
I quickly realise that my house is being broken into and need to get ready to deal with it.
Looking around my room to procure an item I could use to defend myself with I had to opt to picking a guitar.
The guitar I chose was the Harley Benton 8 string guitar.
(Harley Benton R-458 BK Progressiv Series)
Armed with that beast, I charge downstairs and encounter the burglar breaking and entering.
At this point there's glass all over the floor and the burglar is making his way into the house.
Holding the 8 string guitar by the headstock I approach him and tell to get the F out.
The burglar threatened cut to me with a box cutter so bashed him across the head with 8 string!
He hit the ground like a sack of shit but he quickly got to his feet before I hit him again and jumped back out through the window and took off running!
I tried to cut him off by running out the front door but it was locked.
I ran back upstairs grabbed my keys and saw from my bedroom window
that he was getting away.
So instead of going downstairs and out the front door, I jump from the second story window still with the 8 string in hand!
At that moment the burglar looked back while I was mid free fall and look of horror on his face was priceless.
At that point he knew he was F'd!
So he took off running for his life down the street while I charged after him wielding the HB 8 string body raised overhead ready to whack him with it!
I managed to close the distance and I gave him a belt of the guitar across the head and temporarily stun him.
I got infront of him and that this point he brandishes his stanley blade knife and begins slashing at me with it!
Luckily I was able to maintain distance and parry all his attacks by jabbing him in the face repeatedly with the guitar.
Two minutes of knife/guitar duelling we find ourselves out in the middle of the road on a roundabout and all traffic has come to a halt as we continued fighting!
After many well placed strikes the burglar's head was beginning to look like 'Sloth' from 'The Goonies' movie.
Realising that I wasn't gonna give up the burglar then tried to make a get away by hijacking an articulated lorry which resulted in him getting punched straight in the face and falling out of the lorry cab!
He then proceeded to get into another car and threaten the driver telling them to drive.
My heart sank as I thought he was gonna get away but I just couldn't let that piece of shit get away with it, so I chased after the car in what would have looked like a low budget Terminator 2 chase scene!
Somehow I managed to keep up with the car and see where it was going!
The driver had pulled over and the scumbag got out and planned to hide in a barber shop to which he was quickly escorted off the premises because he had a head on him like a buckled mattress.
I ran into them and ask the to call the guards.
Meanwhile the moron went into a neighbouring café and sat down (I think that was the concussion beginning to set in!)
At this stage I had enough and I left the guitar outside and I went in and disarmed and pinned him in the café as staff and customers looked on in confusion but I calmly explained to everyone once I had in an anaconda choke.
The guards appeared in no time and arrested him and put him into the back of the car.
The moral of the story is:
Don't bring a knife to a guitar fight.
A Harley Benton guitar is a great guitar!!